Rut

Stuck in a rut and it sucks.

I am wasting so much time lately. It's ridiculous. Other than school and the gym--- I have nothing to do. Well, I have work, but I rarely work. So essentially what I do is sit/lay down and watch TV, and 1/4 of that time I spend eating as well. I watch so much tv and eat so much. I love it. But I do want to change.

Or do I?

I am really enjoying being this lazy. I don't really want to be responsible for anything really right now. I don't want a second job or a new job or any new responsibilities to do.

I'm really going to enjoy the next few months because my course load is so light and I have all of this time to do bullshit.

I was talking about this with someone a few months ago. I always feel busy, but I really am not.

All I know is that I am pretty bored. Although I am bored even during exciting things.

I need to start a new project or something on my own. Like finally get around to sewing again. Or I could start an art project. That would be fun.

But the funny thing is that I am now addicted to watching TV and going on the computer constantly. I need to cut that out and start something new.

This is actually really sad. My life seems so sad. But I am stuck in a rut, and I am going to get out.