What I really want

This is a list of things I really want right now. Some of these things seem selfish, and others... well all of them are, that is the point. Most are unrealistic.

- My own house or apartment. Just a place to live. I want to have a place to live for university that is not residence. A house would be nice, but obviously, I can barely afford an apartment

- A car. Simple as that. I want a car that I can drive everywhere, like even across Canada, and down to the states. So a nice car that has barely any milage on it would be nice.

- I want to travel. In history I will start thinking about different cultures and societies or the teacher will start talking about somewhere she went... and I am just like.... urgh I want to go places! Lately I've really wanted to go to Greece, Egypt, everywhere in the UK, Western Canada and Northern Canada (territories). I am just like ahhhh let me see the cultures.

- More time to learn. I love learning, but school is taking up too much of my time. I really want to read more about politics and sociology lately. I want to get up to date on current events. I want to have time to read the paper. I suppose if I really wanted to, I could. But I don't want to put in that much effort. 

- I want my ankle to get better. I want to go run 20km LIKE RIGHT NOW. But I FUCKING CAN'T! My goddam ankle is terrifyingly bad. Quick fix? SEe a doctor. You know what? I did. I saw my doctor. She referred me to a sports doctor. They are open twice a week and NEVER ANSWER THEIR PHONES! How the fuck? I don't live in Kingston, I can't just drive in and make an appointment. I am actually so afraid I'll never be able to run again. If a doctor tells me so, I am going to need a fucking sports psychologist. 

- For this guy to just ask me to be their girlfriend already. I made the majority of big moves in our relationship, I don't want to be the one to ask for us to be official. I have a feeling I am going to have to ask to hang out again. It's not like he doesn't like me... I mean he flirts with me enough, and he was the one who kissed me. This isn't fucking grade 7 -_-. But he is in grade 10.. so... maybe he is just afraid? Ugh. 

- A dog. I have a dog, but I want a dog for when I go to university. I know dogs are a lot of work, which I am willing to put in the work. I just can't afford to keep up a dog. I wish I could.

K. So I am going to go buy a house somewhere, kidnap the guy, buy a dog, put them in my car, drive to Yukon and read a book. Oh, I may need some magic to cure my goddam ankle.

Fuck this shit.

Well. I think I am getting over my depressive bout. I get depressive bouts occasionally, I feel like I am almost out of this one. I still get slight whatevers once in a while. Like about my ankle just now. Like it makes me want to cry. If you were to try to understand, just imagine if you were unable to read, or unable to study your favourite subject anymore. Ugh. I can't run for over 2km without my ankle starting to hurt.