I watched Eighth Grade and it made me reflect on my younger years. I forgot about how much I used to blog. I used to come home everyday and just blog for like 15 minutes until an hour. I miss it, I really do. I've always tried to do YouTube and just didn't realize that I have my whole blog I have been doing. I need to get back into it. It helps me think through things in my life.
If anyone is out there still somehow subscribed to this blog, let me update you on a few things in my life.
I moved back into my mom's with my boyfriend. I said I would never move back here again. In some ways I don't mind being back here because it takes a lot of pressure off of myself to be making rent and doing things like that. But I also miss having my own space. I miss it a lot. I've barely ever had my own space just because I lived with my boyfriend for 4 years in apartments. I really liked that time in which I was living in residence but it wasn't that exciting either. I just wanted to be with my boyfriend the whole time.
I'm trying to get a grasp on my marijuana use. I definitely have substance abuse problems, just addiction in general. I need to get a grasp on my financial situation, so I need to get a grasp on my drug use.
My health is poor. I don't eat healthy, I don't work out much, my heart has problems and I have high blood pressure. I gained 60lbs since starting university (I have been out of uni for about 2 years now).
I've lost myself a little. But I've also never known myself. I seem to be stuck in that phase that 13-year olds are in where they are trying to figure out who they are, but I still don't know.
I have applied to teachers college. I hope I get in, I will be devastated if I don't. I really want to be an educator and work with high school students. I think everything about myself ultimately points to doing that for a living.
I can't believe I am an adult. There is no way. I don't feel like one at all. I don't like being an adult. I hate bills. I hate my credit card debt. I hate my school debt. I feel TRAPPED. You are so free as a teen. I don't know how it is okay to let a 17 year old decide what to do for their education. I feel like I've wasted some years but I am only 23. I am basically still a teen. I feel like socially I am so inept that I might as well be a teen. I am getting better.
My depression has gone away for the most part, but my anxiety is worse than ever. I am hoping to get some medication for it on the 11th, but I have had trouble getting these meds for a while. Doctors are useless.
I guess we will see when the next time I blog is. It might be soon, it might be in a few years. I'll be back, someday.
If anyone is out there still somehow subscribed to this blog, let me update you on a few things in my life.
I moved back into my mom's with my boyfriend. I said I would never move back here again. In some ways I don't mind being back here because it takes a lot of pressure off of myself to be making rent and doing things like that. But I also miss having my own space. I miss it a lot. I've barely ever had my own space just because I lived with my boyfriend for 4 years in apartments. I really liked that time in which I was living in residence but it wasn't that exciting either. I just wanted to be with my boyfriend the whole time.
I'm trying to get a grasp on my marijuana use. I definitely have substance abuse problems, just addiction in general. I need to get a grasp on my financial situation, so I need to get a grasp on my drug use.
My health is poor. I don't eat healthy, I don't work out much, my heart has problems and I have high blood pressure. I gained 60lbs since starting university (I have been out of uni for about 2 years now).
I've lost myself a little. But I've also never known myself. I seem to be stuck in that phase that 13-year olds are in where they are trying to figure out who they are, but I still don't know.
I have applied to teachers college. I hope I get in, I will be devastated if I don't. I really want to be an educator and work with high school students. I think everything about myself ultimately points to doing that for a living.
I can't believe I am an adult. There is no way. I don't feel like one at all. I don't like being an adult. I hate bills. I hate my credit card debt. I hate my school debt. I feel TRAPPED. You are so free as a teen. I don't know how it is okay to let a 17 year old decide what to do for their education. I feel like I've wasted some years but I am only 23. I am basically still a teen. I feel like socially I am so inept that I might as well be a teen. I am getting better.
My depression has gone away for the most part, but my anxiety is worse than ever. I am hoping to get some medication for it on the 11th, but I have had trouble getting these meds for a while. Doctors are useless.
I guess we will see when the next time I blog is. It might be soon, it might be in a few years. I'll be back, someday.
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