I tend to look at the negatives and things and specifically find the negative things in people, events, causes, etc.
I don't think it is a bad thing. My mind is extremely twisted compared to society, though.
I don't think being sad, depressed, angry, pessimistic, negative, etc., is actually "wrong" at all.
Maybe I am not a pessimist. I generally don't expect the worst in the world, I don't expect the good either. I try to look at things rationally. I do look for the bad in good things, though. But I don't expect bad things to happen. I also don't believe everyone is inherently evil, but I also don't believe everyone is inherently good. I think some people are and some people aren't "evil" or "bad". Although this gets me into the philosophical discussion of "What is good? and what is bad" which I am not getting into right now.
I don't totally think I am the definition of a pessimist. But I definitely am not an optimist. I'm just a negative person, I suppose. Negative, not pessimistic. Maybe my viewpoint is just different from everyone else's, well I know it is.
I used to be an extremist optimist around grade 7-9, especially in grade 8. I remember having like three different smiley face necklaces, which I would wear. On this one website whyville.net, I used to go on, my avatar was always wearing something that was a smiley or said "be happy" or something like that. I celebrated random weird holidays like "mint chocolate day" and used to skip around school like an annoying destinations student. (Destinations was a program for grade 7-8 students I was in).
I don't know when that exactly ended, but sometime when I first got into high school, probably.
The more I look at it, the more I see I am not really a pessimist. I am more of just a non-conformist, and since the conformist thing to do is to be happy and be an optimist, I just try to do the opposite of that. I'd really like to be able to understand the psychology of a non-conformist, better. I always strive to do the opposite of the majority.
For example, you know that really light colour green that is really popular right now (like this), well I used to absolutely love that colour like 1-2 years ago. Now it is overused, and I hate it with a passion.
Maybe I just try to bail on society and conformity. I'm not sure. But for whatever reason, I just hate the thought of being the same as everyone else, which is why I have essentially isolated myself, became quite the individualist and egoist. I just try to express the fact that I am a single person, there is only one of me. I have always thought this, even when I was what I call an "extremist optimist". I always said "be yourself!". I also remember thinking to stop saying "Be yourself" because everyone always says that, and to say something different. So I guess I was sort of a non-conformist back then, too.
I'm just negative. It's funny because I love being a negative person, and you think that I'd be super serious (which I usually am) but I am obsessed with comedy at the same time. I just need to balance out my cynical thoughts with weird brain-killing comedy shows and comics.
I'm glad I wrote this post, because it actually helped me figure out that I am not a pessimist. I went in writing this blog post, to try to convince my readers I am. But now I don't think so. Just a negative non-conformist. Carpe diem?
I don't think it is a bad thing. My mind is extremely twisted compared to society, though.
I don't think being sad, depressed, angry, pessimistic, negative, etc., is actually "wrong" at all.
Maybe I am not a pessimist. I generally don't expect the worst in the world, I don't expect the good either. I try to look at things rationally. I do look for the bad in good things, though. But I don't expect bad things to happen. I also don't believe everyone is inherently evil, but I also don't believe everyone is inherently good. I think some people are and some people aren't "evil" or "bad". Although this gets me into the philosophical discussion of "What is good? and what is bad" which I am not getting into right now.
I don't totally think I am the definition of a pessimist. But I definitely am not an optimist. I'm just a negative person, I suppose. Negative, not pessimistic. Maybe my viewpoint is just different from everyone else's, well I know it is.
I used to be an extremist optimist around grade 7-9, especially in grade 8. I remember having like three different smiley face necklaces, which I would wear. On this one website whyville.net, I used to go on, my avatar was always wearing something that was a smiley or said "be happy" or something like that. I celebrated random weird holidays like "mint chocolate day" and used to skip around school like an annoying destinations student. (Destinations was a program for grade 7-8 students I was in).
I don't know when that exactly ended, but sometime when I first got into high school, probably.
The more I look at it, the more I see I am not really a pessimist. I am more of just a non-conformist, and since the conformist thing to do is to be happy and be an optimist, I just try to do the opposite of that. I'd really like to be able to understand the psychology of a non-conformist, better. I always strive to do the opposite of the majority.
For example, you know that really light colour green that is really popular right now (like this), well I used to absolutely love that colour like 1-2 years ago. Now it is overused, and I hate it with a passion.
Maybe I just try to bail on society and conformity. I'm not sure. But for whatever reason, I just hate the thought of being the same as everyone else, which is why I have essentially isolated myself, became quite the individualist and egoist. I just try to express the fact that I am a single person, there is only one of me. I have always thought this, even when I was what I call an "extremist optimist". I always said "be yourself!". I also remember thinking to stop saying "Be yourself" because everyone always says that, and to say something different. So I guess I was sort of a non-conformist back then, too.
I'm just negative. It's funny because I love being a negative person, and you think that I'd be super serious (which I usually am) but I am obsessed with comedy at the same time. I just need to balance out my cynical thoughts with weird brain-killing comedy shows and comics.
I'm glad I wrote this post, because it actually helped me figure out that I am not a pessimist. I went in writing this blog post, to try to convince my readers I am. But now I don't think so. Just a negative non-conformist. Carpe diem?
No comments:
Post a Comment