Allow me to explain the title of this post.
I am quite healthy. I am 18 in 11 days, up until before this summer started I had never smoked, never been drunk, I had run 2 half marathons, a 30k, I ate rather healthy (rarely eating sweets, I don't drink pop, chips, etc) and I was pretty balanced out. The only thing any doctors had any concern over was my caffeine consumption, which is rather high.
But other than that, I have always been average weight, on the cusp of being underweight, but I was never underweight. I worked out, running and lifting weights 4-6 times a week for 1-2 hours per session.
But that was before.
Now I still run, I still go to the gym. Not as often, around 4 times a week, but I rarely get in a good 2 hour workout anymore. I don't have the time now that I am in university.
I still do not drink alcohol, although I do plan to drink eventually. I just don't have access to alcohol and it is still technically illegal for me to drink, anyways.
I do smoke cigarettes. Not often. It was a choice that I made, nobody peer pressured me into anything, I just chose to. I smoke maybe 5-8 cigarettes a month. Not packs, individual cigarettes. I understand that each one takes away from my life, I know it is making me unhealthy. But guess the what? I am doing it anyways even though I fully realize how stupid it is- this is how stupid I am. Also I ran 45km this week and I have also smoked 2 cigarettes as well. It's more than what you're doing. I'm still lapping all of you.
I have began eating worse, as well. I still eat healthy a lot, but when I eat unhealthy I barely eat that day. I might have like almost 800mg of caffeine, and then ice cream and chocolate and maybe breakfast on top of that.
Why am I letting go of my health when it is so important to me?
Well, honestly, why does it matter? We are all going to die. I am still running and lifting weights, it's just I have less time and now my body is gaining weight and losing muscle, even though I am still probably working out about 8 hours a week.
I am not giving up on my physical fitness. I am planning on eating healthier again, soon. I am not where I am living this week so it has been harder. I also went on a weekend trip which threw me off and I also have midterms right now. So that I suppose does give some excuse to my eating habits. But I still plan to get back on track this week.
But I am smoking. Why do I smoke? I want to. It is nice to wind down with, it helps me relax and focus.
All I know is that I am going to ruin my heart. Studies show that running is actually super bad for your heart. Apparently there are heart issues in the family, with blood clotting (even with healthier members). My 10 year old cousin had a heart murmur just last year, and she is 10! I am starting a medication soon which has side effects of thickening blood (especially when you combine cigarettes). Well, I am going to have a heart attack. I am going to keep running. I am going to run a marathon this May (hopefully). I am going to take these pills even though I really don't want to. I am going to keep smoking.
My doctor also literally told me I am going to get cervical cancer because I didn't get the HPV vaccine. Well, I am sorry guys. I am going to get cancer and have a heart attack and die.
Bye guys, bye.
I am quite healthy. I am 18 in 11 days, up until before this summer started I had never smoked, never been drunk, I had run 2 half marathons, a 30k, I ate rather healthy (rarely eating sweets, I don't drink pop, chips, etc) and I was pretty balanced out. The only thing any doctors had any concern over was my caffeine consumption, which is rather high.
But other than that, I have always been average weight, on the cusp of being underweight, but I was never underweight. I worked out, running and lifting weights 4-6 times a week for 1-2 hours per session.
But that was before.
Now I still run, I still go to the gym. Not as often, around 4 times a week, but I rarely get in a good 2 hour workout anymore. I don't have the time now that I am in university.
I still do not drink alcohol, although I do plan to drink eventually. I just don't have access to alcohol and it is still technically illegal for me to drink, anyways.
I do smoke cigarettes. Not often. It was a choice that I made, nobody peer pressured me into anything, I just chose to. I smoke maybe 5-8 cigarettes a month. Not packs, individual cigarettes. I understand that each one takes away from my life, I know it is making me unhealthy. But guess the what? I am doing it anyways even though I fully realize how stupid it is- this is how stupid I am. Also I ran 45km this week and I have also smoked 2 cigarettes as well. It's more than what you're doing. I'm still lapping all of you.
I have began eating worse, as well. I still eat healthy a lot, but when I eat unhealthy I barely eat that day. I might have like almost 800mg of caffeine, and then ice cream and chocolate and maybe breakfast on top of that.
Why am I letting go of my health when it is so important to me?
Well, honestly, why does it matter? We are all going to die. I am still running and lifting weights, it's just I have less time and now my body is gaining weight and losing muscle, even though I am still probably working out about 8 hours a week.
I am not giving up on my physical fitness. I am planning on eating healthier again, soon. I am not where I am living this week so it has been harder. I also went on a weekend trip which threw me off and I also have midterms right now. So that I suppose does give some excuse to my eating habits. But I still plan to get back on track this week.
But I am smoking. Why do I smoke? I want to. It is nice to wind down with, it helps me relax and focus.
All I know is that I am going to ruin my heart. Studies show that running is actually super bad for your heart. Apparently there are heart issues in the family, with blood clotting (even with healthier members). My 10 year old cousin had a heart murmur just last year, and she is 10! I am starting a medication soon which has side effects of thickening blood (especially when you combine cigarettes). Well, I am going to have a heart attack. I am going to keep running. I am going to run a marathon this May (hopefully). I am going to take these pills even though I really don't want to. I am going to keep smoking.
My doctor also literally told me I am going to get cervical cancer because I didn't get the HPV vaccine. Well, I am sorry guys. I am going to get cancer and have a heart attack and die.
Bye guys, bye.
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